Impossible Situations
by aces
Summary: A scene from "Our Man Bashir" from Julian's POV


I don't know about anyone else, but there was one scene in "Our Man Bashir" (and believe me, it was the only scene!) that annoyed me. I didn't like the way Bashir was acting when he shot Garak; that seemed entirely out-of-character and not at all appropriate for a man who took an oath to save lives, not kill them. So I rewrote the scene (I'm getting quite good at that), basically from Julian's POV, and I think it makes more sense now. Or maybe that's just delusions of grandeur and/or wishful-thinking. Anyway, the scene isn't mine, the characters aren't mine, and I make no profit off this story. I'm just playing God for a couple moments and changing things to suit my own purposes. J

Impossible Situations

He fired the gun.

It was such a tiny thing, such a beautiful gold color, and so deadly. It could be. But not necessarily. He hoped to God it wasn't necessarily deadly.

_"I'm afraid I don't believe you'll pull that trigger."_

"I wouldn't be so sure about that." He kept his voice level, his hand steady, but inside he was shaking. He really didn't want to pull that trigger. He really wasn't prepared to kill Garak. But he wasn't prepared to let the others die either. 

Such an impossible situation. And so unfair. This was just suppposed to be a fantasy, a game, a holosuite program, a way to relax and have fun. Why did it have to suddenly become another case of life and death? It was so silly. There was no need for anyone--anyone_--to die. And there was no need for Dr Julian Bashir to be making the decision of who would have to be sacrificed. He was so tired of stopping everyone from killing each other. Tired of keeping everyone safe, and alive. And Garak was definitely not helping him, forcing him to choose between one and many._

He kept the gun, the tiny deadly little gun trained on Garak, hoping the Cardassian--his friend--wouldn't make him make a choice.

"Computer, show me the mechanism--"

He fired the gun.

Julian flinched very slightly as the gun fired, blinking, then strode immediately toward Garak, his face an expressionless mask while his heart lurched inside his chest. He hoped to God it wasn't serious; if it was, there was nothing the human doctor could do here, now. The gun was such a tiny thing; it couldn't do any real damage, could it?

Garak was wincing, dabbing at the bloody spot on his neck, looking up at Julian in shock. Julian stepped up to him but kept his distance, and saw that the Cardassian was fine. He breathed out slightly, the relieved expression on his face that neither man noticed quickly disappearing. He reached out automatically, not quite touching Garak's neck, to assess the wound. "You'll be fine. It's just a flesh wound," Julian told him, his voice still rough, strained. His heart was slowing down at last; he felt like he could breathe again.

"That was awfully close. What if you'd killed me?" Garak asked, still holding his bloodied hand up in front of him and looking at it in morbid fascination.

"What makes you think I wasn't trying?" Julian answered coolly, even though inside he was still shaking. He wasn't going to let anyone die. Not for some stupid holoprogram. But he didn't want to think about how close he might have come to a major artery in the Cardassian's neck.

A new respect flashed in Garak's pale eyes. "Doctor, I do believe there's hope for you yet."

_I hope you're wrong_, Julian thought fervently but thrust the idea away; he had more important things to tend to, like saving his friends' lives. "Well, I'm so relieved," Julian replied acerbically in his dry, elegant accent. He started moving, knowing he had to hurry. "Now, we have to get to the control room. Are you coming or not?" he called over his shoulder, determined to not let Garak stall him anymore, determined to get to the others in time.

Garak felt at his wound again, looked down at the blood on his hand, watched the back of Julian's tuxedo stride away. "Well, who am I to question Julian Bashir, secret agent? Lead on!"

Julian hid his relief.

Such an impossible situation.


End file.
